Life in Solitary (Full Report)
I'm trying to get rolling for production. The Confinement has me living in solitarty and getting judgemental a**ho**s judging my reaction to it.
The Lockdown is not really any different to me. I have only left my house one time in the past month, for a doctor's appointment. I have a long list of people who say they are "going to," but don't. Going to visit. Going to help me with a problem at the house. And they stopped appearing long before the threat of plague was on the horizon.
i have someone who bring by groceries, once a week, spends 10 minutes talking and is sometimes back for a quick visit. it doesn't equal the "hour in the yard" and interaction with food delivery to a cell in real prison solitary.
But I don't have a lot of in-depth conversation with a 14 year old and an 11 year old. In the process my main phone line was unplugged while one was charging his phone. Took a couple of days to figure out that there was a problem, then what the problem was. Their sister wants her turn to come visit, but I'm leary of an overnight visit. We have suggested an afternoon and have decided that I will teach her some art techniques (light and shadow for drawing). That feels right. When it happens. If it happens.
Most of all I am told that I am a risk by people with other risks all day long. Today I was told a guy who has not visited for week, that his family asked me not to visit after he got off work today. Told by people who have people in their homes. He goes to work, dealing with the public in food service, but I am over the line. I have had several people tell me my attitude is bad.
So I am focusing on video. On the Ubuntu system. For the YouTube channel.
I backed up on YouTube. 18.04 is the "stable" release, with support through 2006. Stable does not mean "stable" as I understand it. I have had sudden, unexpected restarts while working on graphic programs - GIMP, Inkscape, Pinta. It loses whatever I was working on.
I have had documents vanish mysteriously, and not show up on file searches (using "Catfish"). For example, a document called APA #1 was worked on in LibreWriter. Poof. APA #1 still existed in the menu for Recent Documents but when I tried to open said Recent Document, I got the message "this document does not exist." I searched through Catfish. Nothing.
I find that working on Google Docs, which has grown up to be a working word processor (not the proprietary note app it was years ago when I last looked), is an option. it automatically saves. But is limited to web access, which, in my trailer park, is not always a stable commodity.
I find I like working in FocusWriter, a "distraction free" word processor with very limited formatting option. You cannot change typefaces within a document, there are style presets limited to a half dozen according to what the programmer decided you should want, and tabs are default only. But it offers a black screen with letters (green or gold, depending on my choice before beginning to write), like the old WordStar I loved on my KayPro and IMS CP/M systems.
Glowing, color letters on a black background is comfortably familiar and I can adjust to the fancy free interface without regret. I have been writing.
And FocusWriter is also available for Macintosh.
So I am moving to have a dual system. Not a dual boot because every attempt to use that process have been disasterous for me. And Windows, for all the salesmanship that has made it the most popular operating system, runs counter to my way of thinking. I have a Windows 10 operating on a laptop with an Ubuntu dual boot (Ubuntu Studio 19.10). The speed of Ubuntu makes Windows an undesireable option, and there are programs that will only run in Windows...
So I will have a switch. I have taken the old Mac Mini, supplied by a friend from the old BMUG salad days in Berkeley (the B of BMUG). I have installed 10.13 (with a USB 10.13 install stick, which Apple does not like). It has upgrade as far as it can. I will not upgrad to 10.14 and certainly not to 10.15, which has blocked access to Open Source like Audacity, LibreOffice, FocusWriter, and the video packages I have been learning.
I will have one monitor with a switch to allow me to go from my Ubuntu 18.04 system and the Mac 10.13 OS. Two separate boxes with full dedication to its working.
For storage I have opted for a paid option - pDisk 500Gig. All of the systems and all of the boxes I have, including my cell phone, have ties into the cloud system offered by pDisk. My documents, provided I have chosen wisely on the program for each document, are available. If a computer explodes (which is about the only thing that hasn't happened in my computer dramas over the past five years or so), all of the documents can be picked up from a different box and work can continue.
Coordinating fonts and typefaces is a strugle, but simplifying my options has been good. There will be problems - the MacOS prefers OTF and the Linux prefers TTF. Tech. Geek-talk. But I will adjust my documents and designs to accommordate the new reality.
And there is a method to my madness - for publications like my book, serif fonts - headlings and body copy. Usually tame, vanilla typefaces like Garammond or Palatino or one of the Adobe Pro package, of which I still retain legal copies. For "newsletter" and promotions, san-serif for readability. I am growing fond of Optima for body copy, and may go with the old Algol option of Piegnot for headlines. Optima works well with italics and bold, so the readability remains there with stresses chosen for the content.
Some projects may get a more customized graphic treatment.
But against the background of reliable systems (once again) and division of work between what works best for each system, I hope the results will be a stream of material within the previously announce channels.
Specific information on my current projects.
PTSD Video
I have outlined the PTSD video in the form of a presentation (PowerPoint is the most familiar, but I have been working in Apple Keynote). This outline of material and transitons is the blueprint on which I will base the instructional video. PTSD has had some excellent research over the past few years and I have arrived at a definiition that is a result of those effort. My definition is:"PTSD is the catastrophic loss of Trust as the result of events, usually violoent, which cannot be escaped."This includes the most familiar form of PTSD, that which comes from military service, particularly in combat. But that is, according to the CDC, the least of the PTSD diagnoses. It includes rape and violent crimes with or without fear of death, some automobile accidents, but particularly continued abuse of children
Trust is, according to Eric Ericson, the foundation of human personality development. To recovery from PTSD one is required to reverse the normal developmental process and Risk (the second task) before you can again Trust (the first task).
The PTSD section is the first unit in my three class "Haunted Recovery" cirriculum, which has been given 30 times over the past ten years at the Healing-Transitions in Raleigh. The rest of the cirriculum is also intended for release to YouTube.
The 3rd Edtion of Recovery Reader will be handled through LibreWriter, which offers excellent indexing tools. This edition will revive the instructions on how to turn the material from the book into a class tailored to the needs of the audience in that specific session. Material that was removed for 2nd Edition (lik the Mazin' Recovery comic strip) will be retruned. New material will be added.
The 3rd Edition promises to be nice and fat with an idex to make it more usefult to anyone with a mind to study it. To study improves your own understanding as you determine what is most important to pass along.
When One Studies, Two Learn.
it is an axiom I love.
Back into RPG
I have had some time away from Jorune, which has been refreshing. It has given me a chance to work on other RPG settings (my fondness for Pulp era adventures has benefited).ORFA will serve Jorune and I will use a spreadsheet to track generation of at least three dozen fully generated chracters of many races, to help a would be Sholari run a game. Just hand the player the race they want to play and GO!
That will, of course, go out to all my Patreon people first.
Teaching art is encouraging me to do art, so I will do the cover for the COLLECTED DANSTEAD TRAVELLER to get that out.
And at the same time I will be pushing my Pulp ORFA toward reality, resting on several decades of pulp era games already accomplished. I'm enjoying tracking games going back to 1992 to raid for the new line of pulpeteer goodies. Should be fun.
Back to My Cell
My cell is luxurious. Computers. Net connection. Roku box. Choice of two beds (we seem have the piss smell and cigaretts out of the front room, sort of). Food. Drink (Diet Pepsi, but it is fluid). I can use my walker to get from room to room. Can even take a shower if I feel like taking the risks associated.I'd rather have people sharing the isolation wiht me. Real conversation. Facial expressions. Subtlety of someone in the next room reality. Like I had once upon a time.
Production First, then Patreon
The people subscribing to Patreon have allowed me to get groceries at the end of the month.But before I push Pantreon at all, I need to produce some output to show what I'm asking people to support. The support is nice, but without the products, it's just charity. Which is not what I was going for.
Back to work in my cell.
Keep the faith. And add a Patreon link, please.
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